An international bestseller, Barbara Coloroso’s groundbreaking and trusted guide on bullying—including cyberbullying—arms parents and teachers with real solutions for a problem that affects almost all...

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An international bestseller, Barbara Coloroso’s groundbreaking and trusted guide on bullying—including cyberbullying—arms parents and teachers with real solutions for a problem that affects almost all school age kids.

“An extremely helpful book that both parents and teachers can use to deal with bullying.”—Publishers Weekly

First published over a decade ago, The Bully, the Bullied and the Bystander quickly became the definitive guide to bullying prevention and intervention, providing real solutions for a problem that affects young people all over the world. Now, in this thoroughly updated and expanded book, Coloroso helps you recognize the characteristic triad of bullying: the bully who perpetrates the harm; the bullied, who is the target (and who may become a bully); and the not-so-innocent bystanders—peers or siblings who either watch, participate in the bullying or look away, and adults who see bullying as “teasing,” not tormenting, and as “boys will be boys” or as “ girl drama,” not the predatory aggression that it is. In this book you will learn:

  • What bullying is and what it isn’t
  • The four ways and three means of bullying
  • Technology resources and solutions to deal effectively with both online and offline bullying
  • Seven steps to hold accountable and reform someone who bullies
  • Four abilities that protect young people from succumbing to a bully
  • How young people can stand up, speak out, and take responsibility

Drawing on her decades of work with troubled youth and her wide experience with conflict resolution and restorative justice, Barbara Coloroso offers practical and compassionate solutions and gives parents, caregivers, educators and—most of all—young people the tools to break this cycle of violence.



  • What bullying is and what it isn’t
  • The four ways and three means of bullying
  • Technology resources and solutions to deal effectively with both online and offline bullying
  • Seven steps to hold accountable and reform someone who bullies
  • Four abilities that protect young people from succumbing to a bully
  • How young people can stand up, speak out, and take responsibility
  • What bullying is and what it isn’t
  • The four ways and three means of bullying
  • Technology resources and solutions to deal effectively with both online and offline bullying
  • Seven steps to hold accountable and reform someone who bullies
  • Four abilities that protect young people from succumbing to a bully
  • How young people can stand up, speak out, and take responsibility

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